Sunday, 17 April 2016

Thoughts of an Introvert at a Party

I got invited to the birthday party of a friend of a friend, and inspired by the enthusiasm of my roommates and the promise of jiving, I rashly said yes, even though in the past three weeks I have been living in a whirlwind of social occasions.


"A party that starts at 8.30 pm? That's almost bedtime! Why would any party START at 8.30?"

"I'm so tired. So tired. Sooo tiiired."

"Didn't I just read an article about introverts that said introverts can survive on two to three social occasions per week.. I've been in four social situations JUST TODAY!"

Trying to pep myself up:

"I can do this! There'll be dancing and it's fun to look cute!"

Moment of panic as I arrive and see a bunch of strangers walking into the house:

"What am I doing here? Why am I doing this to myself? Why am I voluntarily putting myself in a social situation with a bunch of people I don't know???"

As I walk in and see one of my oldest friends:


Sitting awkwardly in a sub-room of the main party hall, staring into the distance. Small talk, making a small effort to introduce myself to people, then lapsing into silence again.

 "The underneath of that couch looks like a good place to hide. Whoops, introvert thought. At least I haven't located the bathroom."

Moved to main hall with disco lights and blaring music. After making small talk for a while, I find a plastic chair to be my Comfort Zone, clutch my Sprite and settle back into introspective silence.

"Ah. So this is why I usually hate parties."

"How come the other introverts I know don't seem to be bothered by this setting? It's like they've accepted that this is how life is. But it doesn't have to be!"

"How would I optimize this party? The lights would be brighter, but not too bright, so that you can sit in a corner without feeling like you look awkward. No disco lights, that's so overstimulating. The music would be softer so you could actually have conversations without yelling. There would be some kind of game that would make it easier to talk to people you don't know, without having to randomly go up and introduce yourself by yelling over the music. And there would be some way to encourage all the guys who are able to dance to go up and dance with the girls who are longing to get on the dance floor. We don't want commitment, WE JUST WANT TO DANCE!"

"Why is nobody dancing? What kind of boring old people are you?"

"Oh my gosh. I'm at a party with 30 and 40 year olds. I'M SO OLD!"

"Wow. Indians are really socially awkward. No one is initiating conversations with anyone. Except the people that they came with."

See my roommates dancing crazy in the corner:

"I could join them. On the other hand, my Plastic Chair of Comfort is getting more comfortable. Let's just stay here. I'm beginning to enjoy my Recluse persona."

Finally get asked to dance:

"Oh yeaahh! This makes it all worth it!"

Lose my dance partner, but at least a few other couples are dancing now.

"This wall looks like a great place to prop myself against while I wait for someone else to dance with. It's not socially acceptable for me to only dance or be silent at a party? Says what Party Police? I make my own rules! Rebel, that's me!"

Finally decide to create my own fun by teaching my girl friends how to jive:

"Oh yeah! Parties are fun! Dancing is fun! I'm fun! More parties! More dancing!"

 My friends are making going away noises. It's past midnight, but I just got asked to dance again.

"I don't want to go home! I love dancing! Let's dance the night away!"

Finally respond to the fact that our ride really wants to leave. Photos, goodbyes, and a ride home. Back to normal life. No more parties for a while.

P.S. I'm not an extreme introvert, so real introverts don't hate me for being a faker. I can often be the life of the party, have lively conversations at parties, and enjoy being with people. Just not always.


  1. Fun post! I can totally relate! - JP

  2. You speak my mind ever so often. Completely get what you mean here how did you ever know!?