Adventures in Panchgani

Last week my husband and I spent a couple of days in Panchgani, my favourite holiday spot a few hours away from the big cities. It was a special trip with just the two of us as a birthday treat for me – yes, I’m 34! Though a quiet, serene spot in the lap of nature (I sound like a resort commercial), we did not miss out on our share of adventures.

The Prophesying Wife 

I have been known to sleep-talk in the past. I thought I was mostly over it, until our first night in the Panchgani cottage. We had just finished watching a season of Dr. Who, so I was dreaming about saving the universe. In my sleep, I shouted, “Don’t be afraid!”

My husband woke up from a dream where he was worried about the future. “What did you say?”

“Don’t be afraid!”

What I meant to say after that was, “We have found enough traces of human DNA in the TARDIS to reboot the universe,” but apparently that was too complicated for my sleep-addled brain to enunciate. I did half-wake up and realized I was sleep-talking, so then I also tried to say, “That’s good advice no matter the occasion,” but according to my husband, I didn’t actually say those words aloud either.

Anyway, isn’t he privileged to have a wife who gives him solid biblical advice to respond to his nightmares in the middle of the night?

The Drunk Local 

As we walked home from town one evening, we saw an obviously drunk old man weaving his way down the road. The mountain roads were narrow, and with vehicles speeding along them, so we were a little alarmed. “Jesus, please keep this man safe,” said my husband aloud. The next moment a young man on a bike stopped by the drunk man. “Thank you, Jesus, that was quick.”

My relief dissipated in a moment as the old man got on to the back of the bike, and promptly fell off as the bike started moving. The younger man couldn’t have been a relative because he seemed amused. “How much have you drunk?” he said to the man in Marathi. My husband starting crossing the road to help them, and called out in Marathi, “Hey grandfather, hold on tight.” He got on again, clutched the rider tight, and they rode off as I prayed, and my husband’s concern turned to uncontrollable chuckles at the comic sight. I guess the town drunk is funny to everyone else, but probably not to his family.

The Angry Pregnant Lady 

Just next to the cottage where we were staying is a campsite run by my mum’s cousin. We happened to be there at a time when a big group of young people were there for a camp. We passed them playing team building games in a field.

The first afternoon I was exhausted, and fell asleep in the bedroom with the curtains on the big glass windows open. My sleep was deep, but somehow loud voices intruded. Deep in my subconscious I realized someone was intruding, but I couldn’t wake myself up to deal with it. Instead I dreamed that we were sharing the house with a honeymooning couple with all their friends and family dropping in to visit.

In my dream, I kept getting more and more outraged as they overstepped boundaries, used our private kitchen, and talked REALLY loudly and partied in the veranda. I woke up to realize there were really three young people who were not just outside the house talking, but had actually taken over a table in the veranda and were working on a poster for their camp, while chatting away… EVEN THOUGH THEY HAD SEEN ME SLEEPING IN THE BEDROOM.

I’m not typically an angry kind of person, but the righteous anger of my dream took hold of me, and I stalked out and informed them that they were in a private area and that they needed to stay in the campsite area. I’m polite even when I’m angry, but I think the message got across and they soon left. I was fuming! Was it the pregnancy hormones? Oh yes, *I* was the angry pregnant lady. I feel like I would have been even more impressively scary if I had been visibly and heavily pregnant while telling them off.

 A little while later, I heard someone announcing to the kids in the next field, “Please don’t make a noise, there are people staying in the house and they will shout at you.” You bet they will! Grr. In spite of that, a guy and a girl showed up that evening taking selfies in front of the house and seemed surprised when I asked them to take their stuff (that they had deposited again in our veranda) and leave. “Just one more picture.” Some people have no concept of boundaries.

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